Nextgov came across a fascinating new software the Secret Service will be deploying: a sarcasm detector. The software can actually detect much more than that: it is meant to investigate a number of emotions, by examining social media. The Secret Service is software that will watch social media users in real time, collecting everything from "emotions of Internet users to old Twitter messages." 

Secret Service officials have said the software will "synthesize large sets of social media data" and "identify statistical pattern analysis." The sarcasm watcher will help detect "false positives," presumably separating real threats from bad jokes. It also has the ability to send notifications to users, but considering it's the Secret Service, we wouldn't expect (or want) to see a DM from them anytime soon. 

Employees in the Secret Service's Office of Government and Public Affairs will be in charge of using the system. 

Here is a full list of the software’s required functions:

  • Real-time stream analysis;
  • Customizable, keyword search features;
  • Sentiment analysis;
  • Trend analysis;
  • Audience segmentation;
  • Geographic segmentation;
  • Qualitative, data visualization representations (heat maps, charts, graphs, etc.);
  • Multiple user access;
  • Functionality to have read-only users;
  • Access to historical twitter data;
  • Influencer identification;
  • Standard web browser access with login credentials;
  • User level permissions;
  • Compatibility with Internet Explorer 8;
  • Section 508 compliant;
  • Ability to detect sarcasm and false positives;
  • Functionality to send notifications to users;
  • Functionality to analyze data over a given period of time;
  • Ability to quantify the agency's social media outreach/footprint;
  • Vendor-provided training and technical/customer support;
  • Ability to create custom reports without involving IT specialists; and
  • Ability to search online content in multiple languages.

Don't break any laws online, Internet users.