Facebook's got a real case of the Mondays. So collect yourself up off the floor, because you're not the only one having trouble posting new statuses or posting selfies: the social network has been down for everyone all morning.
(Update, 12:40 p.m., via Mashable: Facebook blames network maintenance: "Earlier this morning, while performing some network maintenance, we experienced an issue that prevented some users from posting to Facebook for a brief period of time. We resolved the issue quickly, and we are now back to 100%. We're sorry for any inconvenience we may have caused." The Zuck we used to know never would have stood for this.)
Facebook seem to be experiencing problems worldwide. Mashable first noticed the outage, saying it "seems global." They were also first to use downrightnow to verify the problem's scope. Techcrunch opted to use downforeveryoneorjustme.com, but the results were the same.
If you try to update your status Monday morning, as our fellow Eric Levenson found, you're greeted with this message:
Any others keep getting this problem while trying to post to Facebook? pic.twitter.com/VbJXBM8zFz— Eric Levenson (@ejleven) October 21, 2013
You'll receive a similar note if you try to comment, post new photos, or like another person's status. You can still stalk what your friends posted prior to the outage, but Facebook's currently on a Drake binge: no new anythings.
As Mashable reported, the problem does seem to be widespread, affecting users across the globe. Everyone's slowly coming to the same realization: there's nothing to distract from work.
HOW DO I MAKE RADIO WITHOUT FACEBOOK!?!?— Morgan HOT 105.5 (@morganyep) October 21, 2013
Okay, who broke Facebook? Can't update status on desktop or mobile for now. pic.twitter.com/wcwZDij13E— Neal Augenstein (@AugensteinWTOP) October 21, 2013
wow this new "no statuses allowed" feature on facebook is really forward thinking— Alexander DeLuca (@alexanderdeluca) October 21, 2013
Facebook is down. So you may have to actually do work this morning.— Complex (@ComplexMag) October 21, 2013
Of course, there's always Twitter, Reddit, Imgur, Tumblr or even LinkedIn to soak up your wasted time this morning. Those sites are all working.
In fact, some enterprising Twitter users are at least trying to help Facebook figure its stuff out:
Stick a pencil in the carburetor. #TipsForFacebookTechGuy— Dave Atkinson (@davyay) October 21, 2013
Did you try unplugging it and then plugging it back in? #TipsForFacebookTechGuy— Neal Gillis (@NealGillis) October 21, 2013
Not suffering from these outages was an early Facebook point of pride. You might remember the frantic rant Jesse Eisenberg's Mark Zuckerberg delivered in 2010's The Social Network:
Without money the site can't function. Okay, let me tell you the difference between Facebook and everyone else, we don't crash ever! If those servers are down for even a day, our entire reputation is irreversibly destroyed! Users are fickle, Friendster has proved that. Even a few people leaving would reverberate through the entire userbase. The users are interconnected, that is the whole point. College kids are online because their friends are online, and if one domino goes, the other dominos go, don't you get that? I am not going back to the Caribbean Night at AEPi!
Destroyed! Forever! Friendster! Catastrophe! This is it, everyone: we're witnessing the death of Facebook before our very eyes. Who had October 21 in the pool?
We're kidding, of course. Facebook has half the world under its thumb. It's practically too big to fail. But the social giant has not commented on the temporary outage yet, so we don't really know what's the problem.
This story is developing and we'll update as soon as we learn more.