Discovered: Online dating is a crock, sugar is toxic, mapping the Milky Way and church as a weight loss management technique. 

  • Online dating is a crock. Of course it is. A mutual love of The Wire doesn't mean much of anything in the romance department. And, if humans know nothing about what makes two people click, why would a computer algorithm created by our hopeless species know better? It doesn't, according to new research out of Northwestern. "If dating sites want to claim that their matching algorithm is scientifically valid, they need to adhere to the standards of science, which is something they have uniformly failed to do," explained author Eli Finkel. "To date, there is no compelling evidence that any online dating matching algorithm actually works." That doesn't mean the sites aren't well-stocked dating department stores with plenty of eligible whatevers to try on for size.  [Psychological Science in the Public Interest]
  • Sugar is toxic. At least that's what scientists in Nature believe. Considering the deliciousness kills over 35 million people a year, these researchers are calling for its categorization with alcohol and tobacco. We guess we get some of the same physical enjoyment from sugary treats as we do from those other things. And we guess there are some negative health benefits associated with overdosing. So, yeah, fine, make it toxic. It's just a label, anyway. [The Telegraph]
  • Mapping the Milky Way. Well, the magnetic field of the Milky Way, anyway. But considering how big and vast and spacious it is out there, we're giving props to these researchers. Doesn't it blow your mind that science has mapped the infinite? Fine. Don't be impressed. Anyway, over there to the right, we have an image of both the large and small scales of the magnetic fields in our Milky Way, something researchers didn't know before.  [US Naval Research Laboratory]
  • Church as a weight loss management technique. Perhaps it has to do with guilt or god's reward, but, women who attended dieting groups at churches, rather than universities, lost more weight. Looking at 55 women, the devout one's lost a higher percentage of their body masses. Science thinks it has something to do with having a built-in network. "Church-based groups have a built-in social support system that allows members to see each other, check in, and follow up on behavior changes," said the authors. So it is about guilt, then. [Journal of Black Psychology