The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration collects land and ocean temperature from around the world, and says it definitively: January 2014 was the fourth-warmest January in the recorded history of the world. Yes, yes, we know that it was very cold where you were and that you think climate change is a liberal conspiracy and so on. Thank you for adding that.

From the NOAA's global analysis for the month:

The combined global land and ocean average temperature during January 2014 was 0.65°C (1.17°F) above the 20th century average. This was the warmest January since 2007 and the fourth highest since records began in 1880. … The Northern Hemisphere land and ocean surface temperature during January 2014 was also the warmest since 2007 and the fourth warmest since records began in 1880 at 0.75°C (1.35°F) above average.

You know who lives in the Northern Hemisphere? You, probably, since most people in the world do. Even if you live in hyper-snowy New York City or had to deal with the polar vortex, it was still the fourth-warmest January in the history of the Northern Hemisphere, because the Northern Hemisphere is big. The NOAA's map of deviance from the average shows that the East Coast was colder than normal, but the Earth was still warmer.

So, yes, I am talking to you, Pat Robertson, for saying that climate change is "idiocy" because it's cold out. Yes, I am talking to you, Breitbart.com, for your article about how the record cold temperatures means that 2014 is "global warming's worst year ever." Yes, I am talking to you, Rich Lowry, for your Politico Magazine column railing against John Kerry's "phony climate war."

Nothing so annoys the alarmists about climate change née global warming as when conservatives talk as if a cold snap or snowstorm falsifies the phenomenon. Weather, they explain, rolling their eyes, isn’t climate. You dummies.

Yeah. It's not. In fact! Even this record warmth in January doesn't prove climate change any more than a record cold would have disproved it. That's true. But what the NOAA data demonstrates is how completely stupid it is to say lol it is cold outside now what al gore. Your local weather, I say, rolling my eyes, isn't the broad climate of your region or the variation caused by seasons or the long-term and clearly demonstrated trend toward global warming. You dummies.