GOP forces have outed Maine State Senate candidate Colleen Lachowicz as a hardcore, level 85 rogue of orc descent—meaning yes, the world of politics has completely gotten all World of Warcraft on us.
The convergence of the two worlds culminated with the Maine Republican Party sending out a mailer on Thursday stating that Democratic candidate for State Senate, Colleen Lachowicz, "has been living a time-consuming double life as a member of the World of Warcraft Community" reports Buzzfeed's Rosie Gray and Donna D (picture below). It's supposed to be a smear, not because WoW is addictive and time-consuming and could possibly ruin your social life, but because her character in the World of Warcraft likes to stab things and steal from people.
That, of course, is sort of silly. Seriously, think of all your friends who always cheated when they were in charge of the bank in Monopoly and think for second of how weird people would think you were if they ever found out what you did to your Sims.
What's also revealed in this Lachowicz-WoW kerfluffle is that the left-leaning Daily Kos has its own WoW guild—for non WoW players, a guild is basically the team or gang that you belong to. Some guilds, like the Kos's Wreck List, make you apply in real life. So yeah, there's a pack of Kosians unleashing terror in a fantasy world. Lachowicz even fundraised on the site. "So let's all pitch in a few bucks to help Colleen get elected so she can unleash some serious DPS on LePage," again in non-WoW speak, DPS = damage per-second. Being unable to unleash lots of DPS on someone in the World of Warcraft is sexy.
While Republicans are slamming Lachowicz for being dorky and perhaps violent for saying things like, "So I'm a level 68 orc rogue girl. That means I stab things . . . a lot. Who would have thought that a peace-lovin', social worker and democrat would enjoy that?!," the story is a bit different with Minnesota Vikings punter/gay rights hero/sass dispenser Chris Kluwe.
"It’s no surprise that Kluwe is an avid fan of the role-playing game World of Warcraft (his avatar is a troll called Loate), so much so that his Twitter handle is @ChrisWarcraft," writes Out's Cyd Zeigler. "Among the things he loves most about such games are the parallels they offer to our culture’s battle over freedom. In World of Warcraft, he becomes a champion against evil oppressive forces. Losing isn’t an option."
Kluwe has become internet-famous lately for coming up with the phrase "lustful cockmonster" and fighting back against Maryland state delegate Emmett C. Burns Jr., who told the Baltimore Ravens to "order" player Brendon Ayanbadejo to stop voicing his support for same sex marriage. Kluwe has also penned eloquent, cheer-inducing, logically-sound take downs or, in WoW speak, unleashed massive DPS on Minnesota Rep. Mary Franson and fellow NFL player Matt Birk, both of whom have spoken out against same-sex marriage. "The thrust and parry of video-game discussion boards, he says, helped to hone his debating skills;" writes Ziegler about Kluwe in Out.
That said, it seems like a looming and inevitable coalescence of the World and Warcraft and our political world are on the way. We wouldn't want you to leave you unprepared, so we've put together a slapdash primer on some WoW you may need to know from here until November:
World Warcraft Is a Two-Party Game:
Even though there are guilds like The Daily Kos's Wreck List, there are two side in this game. One is the Alliance, the other is the Horde. And as one cynical, partisan WoWer describes The Alliance: "Self entitled, not wanting to adapt their ways for the other races of the world. Primarily white. Ruled by men (don't fool yourself wih Tyrande, she's second to Malfurion). Most races justify actions thru their belief in 'the Light'". Yes, the Kos crew is part of The Horde.
The World of Warcraft equivalent of what Mitt Romney did to Obama at the debate Wednesday night.
Think David Axelrod and Reince Priebus—someone in the game whose main job is to harass and troll the opposing team into oblivion.
In WoW-speak area of effect is how big of an area your spell(s) can affect. For example, Mitt Romney's 47 percent video had a massive AOE as people across the country all saw the video. Romney's RNC speech? Not so much.
We went over this.
Basically a fragile player who looks really awesome and impressive and someone who can unleash massive amounts of DPS, but is easily defeated if you can withstand the initial burst. See Perry, Rick.
Griefers do this, where they wait at a slain player's corpse, wait for said player to resurrect, and then kill them again. Kinda like the way McCaskill is doing with Akin at the moment.
Where Kluwe perfected his craft. Thousands of people will bicker here back and forth on the intricacies and nuances of the game. Think of these places like comments sections of any political story only a lot less racist, more moderation, and more thought-out arguments.
Of course this isn't the end all be all of WoW-politics cross-overs (nor do we pretend it to be), but it should hold you over until the election ... or until someone else decides to make this dorky game an issue.