Sorry guys, Part 2 of the Day of October Surprises is a total dud. Donald Trump has been hyping an election revelation all week, and promised to tweet the news at noon Wednesday. The big reveal? At 12:01 p.m., he released a video saying if President Obama releases his college transcripts and passport records, "I will give to a charity of his choice… a check, immediately, for $5 million." This is weak sauce. 

We've already had Part 1 of the Day of October Surprises, which was much more juicy: Gloria Allred is seeking to unseal records related to Staples founder Tom Stemberg's divorce in which, according to TMZ, Mitt Romney testified in the case to help determine the price of Staples stock, and said it was "overvalued" and wouldn't become more than a "dream." Stemberg's ex-wife, Maureen Sullivan Stemberg, seems to think that led to her receiving less than she deserved in the divorce settlement.

We had tried to resist Trump's publicity stunt, since all of his past publicity stunts have been just as disappointing. But Trump has been hyping his bombshell for days, denying speculation the story was about Obama's prior cocaine use or divorce papers drawn up by Michelle Obama in 2000. "This is not a media event or about Donald J. Trump--- this is about the United States of America. I will be making the announcement on Facebook and Twitter tomorrow," he tweeted Tuesday, in a statement that turned out to be half lie. Trump said he was very proud he'd gotten Obama "to release his long form birth certificate, whatever it may be." Today, "I have a deal for the president, a deal I don't believe he can refuse." We think Obama can refuse Trump, even if we the media can't.