The Obama re-election campaign unveiled its new slogan today: Did you catch its connection to Communist China? If you didn't, you're probably not reading enough William Kristol—The Weekly Standard editor who made the connection crystal clear in a blog post this afternoon. 

You see, the president's political machine dubbed its new campaign "Forward " and, of course, "The most famous modern use of 'Forward' to characterize a major political effort was in the 'Great Leap Forward,' in China, sixty years ago," writes Kristol. Ergo, an Obama second term will probably mirror the Communist Party of China's economic and social campaign of the late '50s to early '60s that resulted in, oh, you know, famine, death. displacement and upheaval the world over. Is this campaign name a genuine forecaster of Obama's masterplan? "Who knows?" says Kristol. Who knows, indeed!

Unfortunately for Kristol, the progressive-feeling slogan "Forward" is also indicative of another previous campaign—ten of them to be specific. As BuzzFeed's Zeke Miller points out, campaigns for Washington D.C.'s subway system, MSNBC, Oracle, Jewish newspapersGeneral Electric and even the College Republican National Committee Slogan (gasp!) have adopted the "Forward" messaging.

So it seems as if "forward" might be a motivational kind of word that doesn't necessarily summon the memory of Mao Zedong or breadlines or Communism. But that's just a thought. 

The real tragedy is Kristol's great leap of logic didn't come in time for the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, which tackled the issue of the  ominous things Obama will do in a second term like violant rap music, an escalation of the War on Christmas and a re-ignition of gay pop anthems. (12:20 mark)

Now, if I do win a second term as President ... let me just say something to all my conspiracy-oriented friends on the right who think I'm planning to unleash some secret agenda: You're absolutely right. So allow me to close with a quick preview of the secret agenda you can expect in a second Obama administration. 

In my first term, I sang Al Green; in my second term, I'm going with Young Jeezy. (Laughter.) 

MRS. OBAMA: Yeah. 

THE PRESIDENT: Michelle said, yeah. (Laughter.) I sing that to her sometimes. (Laughter.) 

In my first term, we ended the war in Iraq; in my second term, I will win the war on Christmas. (Laughter.) In my first term, we repealed the policy known as "don't ask, don't tell" wait, though; in my second term, we will replace it with a policy known as, it's raining men. In my first term, we passed health care reform; in my second term, I guess I'll pass it again.

Maybe save this for next year?