Now that a few hours have passed since President Obama released his long-form birth certificate to squash conspiracy theories that he wasn't actually born in America, the biggest names in birtherism have had time to weigh in. Having demanded for years that Obama merely "Show us the birth certificate!" would they be satisfied? No. You don't get clicks from satisfaction.

  • The famous "Queen of All Brithers," Orly Taitz, who's played a role in a handful of lawsuits in which soldiers refused to deploy to war zones because their orders came from an illegitimate commander-in-chief, remains unconvinced. She gets points for originality: Her proof that the document is fraudulent is that Obama's father's race is listed as "African." Taitz explained to Talking Points Memo's Ryan J. Reilly, "In those years ... when they wrote race, they were writing 'Negro' not 'African. ... In those days nobody wrote African as a race, it just wasn't one of the options. It sounds like it would be written today, in the age of political correctness, and not in 1961 when they wrote white or Asian or 'Negro'."
  • You've heard from the Queen, but what about the King of All Birthers? His Birther Highness Andy Martin called the release a "tremendous triumph" for birtherdom. "Well, I'll be damned…it looks OK!" Martin told Mother Jones's Suzy Khimm. "I'm stunned…obviously the pressure got to be too much." But! (there's always a "but") it doesn't explain why it took so long for the document to be released. And Obama's past needs further probing--"The pressure for his college records is going to become relentless." And for good measure, Martin noted--"without elaboration," Khimm says--"Our god is stronger than Obama's god, whatever his god is."
  • An aide to Texas state Rep. Leo Berman, who introduced a bill requiring presidential candidates to produce a birth certificate is not convinced. "What I've seen online, what they produced today, still says certificate of live birth across the top," legislative director Sharon Guthrie told Slate's Dave Weigel. "We want to see a 'birth certificate.' The one that we have that says 'birth certificate' is from Mombassa, Kenya, with his footprint on it. He has still not produced an American birth certificate."
  • But at least someone in Texas is convinced. Rep. John Carter, the Texas Republican who co-sponsored the birther bill, says the issue is "finally resolved." Carter, Politico's David Mark and Seung Min Kim report, is "disappointed that the president took this long to do so. This could and should have been done when the question was first raised."
  • Phil Berg, who filed the first birther lawsuits, says the release is inconsequential, Business Insider's Grace Wyler reports. Why? Because it doesn't prove the Obama was eligible to run for president. What? Berg alleges that Obama renounced his American citizenship when he was adopted by his Indonesian step-father. "I'm not that concerned with the birth certificate... Unless there is evidence that he renounced his Indonesian citizenship, we believe he is an illegal president."

Trump went on to make another veiled affirmation action charge against Obama, asking how he managed to get into a top college. Why won't he release his college records? The new birtherism, many say, is transcriptism. Oh goody.