The "War on Christmas" flames were again stoked today over a statistic citing a majority of Americans wanting to shift the holiday's emphasis from Santa to Jesus. One commenter says neither figure represents his love for the sinister side of Christmas. jeffinohio writes:

I desire Christmas to be about Krampus.

Ah, yes, Krampus. That jolly old beast that roams mountainous villages, terrorizing naughty children—either with rusty chains or birch switches—before whisking them off to his lair to be eaten. How have we strayed so far from the true meaning of Christmas?