Today in celebrity gossip: An underage pop star's drinking might get David Arquette's bar shut down, Jason Biggs made a terrible joke about the airplane tragedy, and Rosario Dawson disrespected her own mother.
Despite the best efforts of a highly paid team of handlers, Justin Bieber has still not turned 21. This means that Justin Bieber's finely honed and carefully curated existence of fast cars, fast ladies, and getting crunked in the club is not quite as legal as he'd like, and once again his underage drinking is landing someone in hot water. But don't worry, Justin Bieber isn't in trouble, David Arquette is. That's because David Arquette co-owns and runs Bootsy Bellows, an exclusive celebrity-frequented night club that is essentially just the back room of a different, easier-to-get-into club on Sunset Boulevard. TMZ reports that after Bieber's most recent visit to this tiny, dark, unimpressive room, pictures surfaced of Bieber holding a Heineken and "the California Dept. of Alcoholic Beverage Control is aware of the incident." That means—get this—the club could be FINED. Justin Bieber, you've gone too far. Anyway, yeah, underage Justin Bieber drank a beer in public.
And then he jumped off a cliff!
Not on the same day, probably. But still. (I love the exclamation of disapproval of the woman holding the camera. She has HAD it.) [TMZ]
Another reason why Twitter should probably be shut down is it allows unfunny people to think they're funny by aping a common language of unconsidered cynicism in the service of seeming snarky. For example, Jason Biggs probably should not have tweeted, immediately after news broke of the Malaysian Airlines nightmare tragedy, this: "Anyone wanna buy my Malaysian Airlines frequent flier miles?" Noting that nearly 300 people died, including 100 prominent AIDS researchers, fans did not love Jason Biggs' joke and he immediately deleted it. But then, in what to me is the way more offensive move, he then tweeted one of the grossest non-apologies possible:
1). Hey all- ok, so- I am deleting my previous tweets. People were offended, and that was not my intent. Sorry to those of you that were.— Jason Biggs (@JasonBiggs) July 17, 2014
There followed three more numbered tweets that expressed sliiiightly more remorse, but still. Jason Biggs should've just walked away from Twitter and instead walked directly into the ocean and kissed Neptune on the lips. [Us Weekly]
At this point the Hamptons residents who hate their Kardashian neighbors were either invented whole cloth from E! producers looking for on-camera drama, or they're just as catty and dramatic as the Kardashians themselves. After a long spring and summer of attempting to prevent the filming of Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian's new Hamptons-set reality series, the residents are now straight-up vandalizing their own surroundings in order to make their stink more stinky. Page Six reports that large, gaudy stickers of the Kardashians' faces with strike-throughs have begun showing up on signs around town:
Cool scheme! But of course, as Page Six notes, "Despite those angry about the Kardashaians’ [sic] Hamptons takeover, others are delighted to see business increase during their stay." So yeah. Local economy and all that. Relax, everybody. [Page Six]
He might play a musical instrument of some kind for the band Fun-period, but lately Jack Antonoff has been more famous for dating Lena Dunham. But also apparently he likes to dabble in slinging hot sizzling beef at other celebrities? In a new interview with GQ the musician really let loose with his thoughts about modern music and some of them are controversial and HIGHLY clickable! For example, on Taylor Swift: "Taylor Swift is cool, because she's the closest thing today that hearkens to Michael Jackson, to great, great pop music." Okay. But Antonoff had less-nice things to say about the music of Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, and Lily Allen: "It all feels throwaway, comparatively." And of pop music in general? "There's a lot of junk." Okay, so it's not like the most brutal takedown of an institution that openly traffics in mediocrity. But come on, Jack Antonoff. Taylor Swift as a modern day Michael Jackson? Sure, there's an eerie physical resemblance, but their music was totally different. Get real. [E! Online]
Either you won't believe this item or it will break your heart, but either way it's a sad, sad shame. Rosario Dawson met her mom for lunch but made her wait for 90 minutes. Do you believe that? Is your heart broken? Is it a sad, sad shame? But yeah, according to Page Six "spies said Dawson’s mom was left cooling her heels while waiting for Rosario to show up for lunch." I'm so upset I can barely type. Who would do this to their own mother? I mean, sure, Rosario Dawson was making a movie with Chris Rock and it "went past schedule," but that is the woman who brought you into this world, Rosario Dawson. Don't disrespect her like that! I am not Rosario Dawson's mother but I am truly hurt and also could you bring me another basket of breadsticks? [Page Six]
Here is Beyoncé just chillin' and casually standing against a brick wall:
Selena Gomez took a selfie out the window of a moving car along with a couple of fans on a motorbicycle:
Uh-oh, Steven R. McQueen is getting very buff, must be time time to start filming The Vampire Diaries again:
Remember those pictures of Rihanna going nuts in the stands of a World Cup match? Guess who was sitting right behind her!
(It was Kellan Lutz, guys, come on.)
Finally, British diver Tom Daley has gone and changed the conversation once again by serving straight-up BEEFCAKE on the cover of Attitude Magazine. Like, look at this:
Just look at it.