The first full trailer for Justin Bieber's concert movie/documentary Believe has been released. Like Katy Perry's All of Me before it, Believe seems to be a big shiny ad for the wondrous and awe-inspiring cultural force — perhaps that's too small; cosmic phenomenon — that is Justin Bieber. Which, fine, that's your right, to tell the story of yourself the way you want to tell it, but it makes for a potentially boring movie.
At several points, Bieber, sporting a sprinkle of peach fuzz below his nose, does appear to address some of his bad behavior, like lashing out at a photographer who said something mean to him. But I can't imagine that we'll get any references to the time he peed in that janitor's bucket or his crew's wild automobile antics that have been plaguing his Calabasas neighborhood for some time now. We will see a contrite Justin, one who knows that he should react calmly and thoughtfully even when people are mean to him, but that's probably about it. Judging from this trailer, anyway.
Beyond that, there will be only rejoicing, at the glory of his stage show, about the crazy trajectory of his life, from Internet nobody to high prince of this realm and the next. You know, like his last movie, Never Say Never. That's what his screaming fans want, I guess. Though in a few years, when they're older and this particular mania has passed, they'll only dimly remember that they lined up to see this movie in the theater, plopped down allowance money so Justin Bieber could insist that they believe in him.