Today in show business news: A Fringe hero heads to Sleepy Hollow, Nancy Meyers drops out of the movie she was born to direct, and another look at American Horror Story: Coven.
Put down your Quiznos foot-longs and pause GTA V for just one damn second, because I have got some fanboy nerd-news for you. John Noble, from the cult favorite Fox sci-fi series Fringe, has joined the cast of Sleepy Hollow, which is from the same producers, for a "major recurring role." He will play "a kind and reclusive man who possesses supernatural powers that have the potential to help ... Ichabod Crane." Oh OK. Sort of like he played a reclusive man who helped the main character in the other one. He was kind of reclusive in that, wasn't he? I don't know. I didn't watch it. Anyway, you can go back to your game and your sandwich, I just thought you should know that that's something that's going to be happening pretty soon. Want me to take anything upstairs with me when I go? Your mom told me to ask if there were any dishes down here. [Deadline]
Oh no. Nancy Meyers, our chief purveyor of glossy lifestyle porn like It's Complicated and Something's Gotta Give (basically be-sweatered older ladies in houses decorated in white), has dropped out of a planned movie about a royal wedding. She and the studio couldn't come to a compromise on who should play the story's young American woman who meets a prince and gets swept off her feet, so she's left the picture. That is ridiculous! Over a casting choice? Please, Nancy Meyers. Please rethink this. Because you need to direct this. Who else could direct it? Just think of the wedding scene! All that white! Come on, Nancy. Just compromise a little on the casting and then focus on what the honeymoon cottage looks like down to every insane detail. Please. For us? Do it for us. [The Hollywood Reporter]
Dear god. Eight Legged Freaks star David Arquette has signed on to costar in a movie that also features six legged freak Paz de la Huerta, a cock-a-roach that a witch turned into a human lady. That's two crazy people in a movie that already sounds crazy. It's called Chuck Hank and the San Diego Twins and it's some kind of action movie about a gang war and involves a character named Salsa, who I'm really hoping is Paz de la Huerta. Arquette plays the main villain. This sounds like a movie that maybe like one person will order on demand when stoned in a year and a half, but that's about it. Which, hey, fine. Whatever. Work is work. I just hope the producers know what they're getting into putting David Arquette and Paz de la Huerta in the same movie. They'd better really like coaxing people down from water towers at three in the morning. They'd better be big fans of doing that. [Entertainment Weekly]
Hailee Steinfeld will play Vince Vaughn's estranged daughter in a comic-based action comedy about a low-life who every gangster and other bad guy in town wants dead. Trying to provide for his daughter, he takes out a big life insurance policy, but has to stay alive for 21 days before it goes into effect. Sounds hilarious! I mean, I'm sure he won't actually die in the end, but still. Yeesh. The movie will be directed by Peter Billingsley, who is a producer and stuff and directed Couples Retreat, but yeah, is mostly the kid from A Christmas Story. What a strange project, on pretty much all fronts. [The Hollywood Reporter]
Actor Richard Coyle has been cast on NBC's show Crossbones as the assassin sent to kill the pirate Blackbeard (John Malkovich) in order to effect regime change in pirate society. Wait, what? This show is about pirates?? I thought it was about Detective Alex Cross coming to work with the team from Fox's hit crime show The Bones! You know, like a spinoff? This is terribly disappointing, I have to say. You'd think a show called Crossbones would be about exactly what that title says it's about, which is Alex Cross solving mysteries with some or all of the cast of The Bones. But no. It's about ding-dang pirates. Why couldn't they call it Pirate Show or Crossbones or something that makes sense? What a dumb thing. [Deadline]
Here is a new preview for American Horror Story: Coven that at least hints at some plot and shows a good amount of Jessica Lange. But more importantly there is a brief shot of voodoo priestess Angela Bassett laughing, and yes. Yes to that. A whole show of that, please. Episodes and episodes and episodes of Angela Bassett laughing maniacally. That's what we all want, isn't it? I can't imagine wanting anything else from this world. Getting excited about this season, guys!