A new trend piece in The New York Times on plastic surgery starts off with a pretty common lament among the booty deficient. “I’ve always had a nonexistent butt," says the story's main source. But the twist this time around is that it's a man—specifically 46-year-old, married-with-kids, Lamborghini driving Jeff Vickers, who had fat from his love handles and lower abdomen injected into his junkless trunk.
We've always known men that have been sensitive about certain parts of their anatomy, but there's been a sizable increase in the number of men who are getting plastic surgery. Ten percent of cosmetic surgeries performed on 2012 were done on men, and the share of men getting buttock surgery rose from 2.2 percent in 1997 to 6.2 percent in 2012. Celebrities like Simon Cowell, Gene Simmons and Barry Mannilow have all admitted to going under the knife.
Look, body issues are body issues are body issues, whether you're a 13-year-old girl or a middle aged man.
The reaction to the story so far has been a mix of glee and head shaking. "[W]ow, we have evolved enough now to give men huge body issues too," read one Twitter in response to the story. "In the end we all look like dried apples, it's all so pointless."
Then again, maybe we can just enjoy this for what it is, a lighthearted trend piece about people with maximized budgets and minimal glutes. “The only way to pump up your derrière is with your wallet,” Vickers notes. A fellow former pancake butt (his wife's words, not ours), addressed only as Michael, 41, got a new $8,500 butt as a birthday present. “My jeans are more comfortable and look better,” Michael said. “I feel more confident and synergistic.”
Right. Bum synergy. And if plopping down $10,000 for a perkier butt seems like a bad way to spend money you don't have, then The Times has a number of cheaper, less permanent enhancement options, such as the Go Softwear Super Padded Brief ($37.50), the 2(x)ist Lift No Show Brief ($24) and the Calvin Klein Body Boost Butt Trunk ($22).