Today in celebrity news: Duchess Kate is learning how to cook, Justin Theroux maybe had a bachelor party, and Faye Dunaway made a very important phone call. 

Royals, they're just like us! Who among us hasn't taken cooking lessons from a palace maid in order to please our prince husband? Pretty common thing. Duchess Kate is doing just that with Antonella Fresolone, the longtime Buckingham Palace housekeeper who was, uh, sorta of given over to Kate and William by the Queen. She's apparently a master of Italian cuisine, and Kate is learning a few recipes from her. Because I'm sure she'll cook all the time, right? Just seems like something that will realistically happen. I mean maybe it will for a little while, when she and Wills are home a lot with the newborn, but eventually I think a duchess, and someday queen, stops cooking. I just think that's the way of things. You probably stop cleaning the bathroom first? That's probably the first normal person thing to go and then maybe weeding the yard. Basically your house is always in great shape and though you've had nothing to do with it. And eventually down the line comes cooking. So I'm glad that Kate is taking lessons from the servant, but it'll probably prove more a novelty than anything else. Ah well. [Us Weekly]

Are Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux about to get married? Theroux just spent a lads weekend in New York, visiting movie sets, eating sushi, and staying out until the wee hours on Saturday night. This was documented by one of Justin Theroux's friends, writer Gavin McInnes, who posted a photo of the two on Instagram and later commented on another picture saying "Bachelor party last night..." He was probably joking, but who knows! I think the real important thing to note here is that Justin Theroux is friends with Gavin McInnes. Like, Taki's Magazine Gaven McInnes. That Gavin McInnes. He does not seem like the best guy maybe? Does that mean Justin is not the best guy too? It is hard to say. It might just mean that they're both sorta "cool dudes" in their 40s and it's hard to find guys like that at that age so they have to stick together. Let's hope it's something like that, because if they agree with each other ideologically, then Jen... You might have another problem on your hands. [People]

Here is a wonderful story. Faye Dunaway was supposed to meet two princes of Brunei at Serendipity 3 on Friday to talk to them about maybe financing a movie of hers. She did not show up. Instead she called the restaurant and said this: "This is Faye Dunaway, the actress. I need to speak to the prince!" Yes. This is Faye Dunaway, the actress. I need to speak to the prince. Is that not perfect? Imagine being the host who gets that call. I mean you work at Serendipity 3, so you probably get lots of crazy old New Yorkers calling you and saying nutty things, but very rarely is it, "This is Faye Dunaway, the actress. I need to speak to the prince." Good for her. Good for everyone involved in this story. Princes of Brunei! Faye Dunaway! Urgent phone calls! It's all perfect. Anyway, she told the prince she was running late but never did show up. No matter. I'm sure she convinced them she's worth the money with that phone call alone. [Page Six]

Justin Bieber (who was booed on stage, poor thing) and Selena Gomez were backstage at last night's Billboard awards and they shared a kiss and a hug hello, and at that moment Taylor Swift happened to be walking by and appeared to stick her tongue out in disgust. Like an "Eyuck!" kind of a thing. I guess Taylor Swift does not approve of Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez? Or she thinks public displays of affection are improper? Whatever the reason, it is of course now a very popular GIF, as all things on this planet someday will be. All GIFs, all the time, on endless loops, forever. I mean, it is a pretty funny GIF. Why did she react that way? Also, isn't that kind of the pot sticking its tongue out at the kettle? Like, she might not kiss boys in public but she's always going on about them in songs and stuff. That's pretty public too! I guess she doesn't see it that way. So, here's the GIF. [Us Weekly]

The police came to Mischa Barton's house last week because of reports of a woman's screaming. Several police cars showed up to her house but when she answered the door there was no one screaming. Supposedly the screaming woman was actually on someone else's lawn down the street, they'd gotten the address wrong, but I'm not sure I believe it. I think she was watching old DVDs of The Beautiful Life: TBL and started screaming and then when the police came she was embarrassed, so she said that the screaming lady was actually down the street. And they found a different screaming lady because it's Los Angeles. There's always some lady screaming in her yard there. That's just what they do. Anyway, poor Mischa. [TMZ]

Old tattooed weirdo Dennis Rodman is currently being trailed for a possible Sports Illustrated cover story, one that proves "he's still relevant and an original," according to a Page Six source. Huh. I guess I won't argue the original part, but in what way is he relevant? I guess in that people like me are writing about him, but beyond that? He did that asinine, offensive trip to North Korea and then...? Has Simon Sez gained some kind of cult following that I'm unaware of? Has the history Carmen Electra become a point of interest all of a sudden? I'm just not sure what would count as relevant here. But oh well, that's for Sports Illustrated to judge, not me. I guess if you're having Sports Illustrated profiles written of you that is relevant in and off itself. Dennis Rodman forever, it would seem. [Page Six]