The rest of the dumb world staggers on amidst all this madness. If you're curious, we've got some celebrity news for you: Mary-Kate had a bad time at dinner, Neil Patrick Harris moves to New York, and LC has a new house.
There is a lot of news going around right now, but we wanted to make sure you didn't miss this important story: Mary-Kate Olsen, one half of the Dualstar twin collective, was out to dinner on Wednesday night with her boyfriend, Olivier Sarkozy, the brother of former French president Nicolas Sarkozy, and she apparently frowned. Yes! Page Six reports that Olsen "looked annoyed" and "wasn't smiling." Good grief. What is going on this week? Why wasn't Mary-Kate, known smiler, happier on her dinner date? It's unclear. Maybe she just saw this picture? A rep for Olsen — really glad Page Six contacted a rep for this important story — says "Mary-Kate was perfectly happy. They had a nice evening." But can we really believe that? Please stay tuned as updates come in. [Page Six]
Meanwhile across the country, Lauren "LC" Conrad from Laguna Beach, The Hills, and various novels she pretended to write, has a new house! She just spent $3.74 million on a 4,300 sq. ft, six-bedroom house in Brentwood. Six bedrooms? What does LC need with six bedrooms? Hm? What's that? She has to house Lo, Jen Bunney, Talan, Jason, and the rest of the gang because they don't have jobs and have no idea how to work? Oh OK. Then, hm, is six bedrooms enough? It might not be. Especially if you throw the Newport Harbor cast in there. Ah well. There's a slideshow of pictures of the house and it looks quite nice! And very big for a single, childless 27-year-old. But it's Los Angeles. What're you gonna do. [TMZ]
Speaking of moving, Neil Patrick Harris and his family are relocating to New York City once Harris is done filming the final season of How I Met Your Mother. Which can't come soon enough as far as I'm concerned! Harris and his partner David Burtka are partly moving because they want to live in a state where same-sex marriage is legal, but also because, come on, LA sucks. Plus Harris likes to do theater, and it's hard to do theater in Los Angeles. I wonder where they'll live! Could be anywhere! No just kidding, they're totally going to live in the West Village. Just like the rest of them. Famous people, I mean. [Us Weekly]
Part-time West Village residents Daniel Day-Lewis and his wife Rebecca Miller just narrowly escaped being exposed to hepatitis. See they had a meal at the restaurant Alta on March 22, the day before a staff member returned from vacation with a hepatitis infection, sparking a scare and requiring hundreds of vaccinations. It's a big messy disaster that Daniel Day-Lewis was almost involved in. Thank god he wasn't! Now there are no victims. Except for other customers and the restaurant and the poor staffer who is now maybe responsible for the ruination of a business. But none of those people are famous, so everything's OK. Phew. [Page Six]
The bundle of sticks dipped in white chocolate known as "Gwyneth Paltrow" was on Graham Norton in England this week and she revealed this detail about her husband, Coldplay frontman Chris Martin: "He has only cooked twice and both times the fire brigade came." Ha ha, tra la la! Who knows if that actually happened, but my guess if it did? That's what Chris wants Gwyneth to think. I think he was actually trying to burn down the kitchen, for the good of himself and his children. "No more of this!" he cried, dousing oil everywhere and lighting it ablaze. "We will eat regular food, at restaurants if we have to!" But then of course Gwyneth glided down from upstairs and called the fire brigade with a strange tinkling sound emanating from her throat. After the fire was put out, Gwyneth smiled at her family and said "Tonight I think we'll have some air berries and wheat thoughts. Doesn't that sound good?" And Chris sighed and looked at his children apologetically and their stomachs growled. [Daily Mail]