Today in celebrity news: The world's most eligible bachelor is heading to America, Lindsay Lohan pulled a fast one on prosecutors, and James Franco is a bad neighbor.

Watch out, ladies! And American polo horses! Prince Harry, third in line for the British crown and known nudity aficionado, is headed to the United States for a tour. He'll be stopping in Colorado Springs for the Warrior Games, for wounded servicemen. He'll be in New Jersey touring areas damaged by Sandy. He'll be in Connecticut playing a polo match. And (omgggg) he'll be in Manhattan for a fundraising party for his brother William's foundation. So if he needs a place to crash or anything... Obviously Harry's handlers will keep him far away from Las Vegas this time, lest he find himself embroiled in another scandal wherein he dared to get naked in a private hotel room. This isn't a holiday, after all. This is his work. No, it'll be straight to the Hampton Inn every night the minute work is done for the day, I'm pretty sure. He'll be allowed to get one pay-per-view movie, rated PG-13 or below, and will have lights out at ten. This is serious business this time. This is not a Panama hat trip. Much as some of us might wish it was. [People]

Speaking of partying, there's a new wrinkle in the latest Lindsay Lohan story. You know how she was recently sentenced to 90 days in the clink, but a judge said he'd allow her to serve that time in a "lockdown" rehab facility instead? Well, it turns out that no such place exists. Like, TMZ looked into it and there is no non-prison-affiliated rehab that will keep patients against their will. So Lindsay could leave whenever she wants. Apparently the prosecution thought that such a place did exist, but it does not. So... either Lohan will have to go to proper jail or she'll have to be very, very good and not check out of whatever rehab she ends up in for three months, even if she's technically allowed to. And the prosecutors... Well, guys, maybe, I dunno, look into it before you say yes next time? Just do a little checking around. That way things like this could be avoided. While this is all sorted out, Lohan has been spotted out at nightclubs drinking some kind of clear liquid that could be water or could be vodka. So, oh well. Oh well to the whole mess. [TMZ]

Joe Biden and his wife Jill went to Once on Broadway on Saturday night, going backstage after the show to meet the cast. Apparently they'd wanted to see the show for months, but hadn't had a chance until now. So, good for them. If they were going to see anything on Broadway, that's probably a good choice, pretty music and all. And completely politically innocuous. Imagine if they'd gone to Book of Mormon or Kinky Boots or something controversial. I mean, it's Broadway so nothing's going to be too controversial, but someone would say something probably if the Vice President went to Book of Mormon. So they chose well. Hopefully they enjoyed the show and Joe didn't annoy Jill too much by singing the songs but with the wrong lyrics all Sunday. [Page Six]

Rihanna was four hours late to an event at a Chicago high school on Friday. She was traveling to Barrington High School to congratulate the students on doing lots of volunteer work and whatnot, but she got stuck in traffic so made the kids wait forever. Then when she did finally get there, she was only there for sixteen minutes. Does that mean that she would have been there for four hours and sixteen minutes had she not been late?? Hm, well, no, probably not. It was probably always going to be sixteen minutes. Sorry, kids. [Us Weekly]

Uh oh. James Franco's neighbors are maaad at him. Complaints have been filed with the Los Angeles Housing Department claiming that Franco is running some sort of production company out of his house, which is causing lots of noise, too many cars, and trash everywhere. One lady says that trash blows into her yard and that Franco's security guys are always "leering at her every chance they get." Not good, Jimbo! No one wants to be the bad neighbor. Also, what kind of trash is blowing all over the place? Paper? Loose hair? Silk scarves? Probably silk scarves. I'm sure James Franco spends at least some time every week running around his backyard and throwing scarves into the wind. Disrespectful for sure. Though at least there isn't a crazy smart monkey living with him and attacking people anymore. I saw that documentary and it was chilling. [TMZ]