Today in celebrity gossip: People really want pictures of Kimye's upcoming baby, Justin Bieber deals with the post-weed world, and a football player does something he shouldn't. 

Musician Kanye West and noted CSI: New York guest star Kim Kardashian are, of course, expecting a child, which means that magazines and photo agencies are desperately bidding to grab exclusive rights to the baby's first public photo. Yeah, that's what people do now, people like Pitt & Jolie, Lopez & Anthony, and of course your parents to that mysterious old crone who showed up at the hospital on the day you were born. (Nothing to worry about there, I'm sure.) But so far, Kim and Kanye have not accepted an offer, even though the bidding has reportedly reached $3 million. That's a lotta scratch! Sure Brand and Angelina got paid a lot more than that, but one would think that they're much bigger international stars than Kanye and Kim are. Still, Kimye wants to hold out, and hold out they will. No word yet on whether they'll ultimately donate the money to charity, like others do, but it would be pretty unseemly if they didn't. I suppose they could just send some over to the have-nots and quietly pocket the rest themselves, but neither of them have ever seemed like greedy or self-involved people, so we really have no reason to think they'd do that. No, I'm sure they're holding out for more money so they can ultimately hand more over to charity, something maybe in the $7 million range. And who can blame them, or, really, anyone for paying that sum. This will be a most glorious child, big of ego and rump, born with a photo-posing expression on its face, immediately possessed of a strange and popular Twitter account. If you had millions of dollars, you'd pay a lot to get first dibs on a photo of that baby too. But you don't have millions of dollars. All you have is some old lady knocking on your door saying she's "come to collect." You should go see what she wants. I'm sure it's nothing. [TMZ]

Speaking of babies, it seems that there was quite literally trouble in paradise over the weekend. Teen heartthrob Harry Styles (One Direction) and twentysomething pop queen Taylor Swift went to the British Virgin Islands last week but the trip was cut short when the couple got in a fight on Friday and Taylor flew home in a huff. The argument didn't seem to faze Styles, though, as the lad was later photographed hanging out in Richard Branson's hottub on the mogul's nearby mystical island. Some sort of source says, "He returned to Virgin Gorda in the early morning hours looking like he had a raucous night." Aha. For her part, Swift tweeted something sad and cryptic on Saturday ("...'til you put me down.") but hasn't said anything else. So, is the young couple done for good? Hard to say in this wild world. All we do know is that Richard Branson's mysterious island is a weird place where many weird things have happened. [Business Insider (bizarrely)]

Justin Bieber Weedgate continues. On Friday a picture was released by TMZ that seemed to show the Canadian chanteur smoking what is commonly referred to as a "blunt," which is essentially a cigar filled with marijuana, smoked for the purposes of getting "nice" or "faded" or "blazed" or "hopped up on goof-grass." So basically Justin Bieber was caught doing what everyone assumed he, and very many 19-year-old North American boys, has been doing for some time: Smoking weed. This of course sent everyone into scramble mode, Bieber apologizing to his fans on Twitter, saying "Everyday growing and learning. Trying to be better. U get knocked down, u get up." He then released a heartfelt acoustic cover of "Tubthumping." No, he just went on to say, "I see all of u. I hear all of u. I never want to let any of you down. I love u." Yes, he sees and hears and loves all of you, because he is a magical angel. Bieber's team is also doing some damage control, and will, we guess, be reprimanding his security team, who did not do the job they were supposed to. As Prince Harry's Nakedgate taught all of us, if you don't want pictures of a rowdy party released, make security collects everyone's phone. Supposedly Bieber's camp puts up signs whenever he's at a party saying that any photo anyone takes is owned by Bieber, not them, but that didn't seem to work in this case. Nor would it be legally binding, I don't think. Unless there is some allowance in the law for signs put up by teen stars' bodyguards? I'm not too familiar with the law on that. So yeah, Justin Bieber smoked pot with some friends and probably had a beer or two and heavens to Betsy people are freaking out. Who wants to be the one to tell them that he's probably had a good deal of sex, too? They're really not gonna like that one. [Us Weekly; Us Weekly; TMZ]

Here's a wonderful reaction to a public partying story. VH1 has a reality show called Love & Hip Hop that just started its second season, and the premiere party sounds like it was quite the time. After the official party, two of the show's stars, Rich Dollaz and Erica Mena, went to Cafeteria in Chelsea and disappeared into the bathroom for a while. Security knocked, to no avail. The pair eventually stumbled out looking "disheveled," and were helped into cars and driven away. So what was happening? Dollaz told Page Six, "You can run with the sex in the bathroom. I won’t confirm or deny. I vaguely remember being there. It was a fun night." Which, ha, OK! Good for you, Mr. Dollaz. Wouldn't it be fun if every celebrity (using that term loosely here, obviously) was that candid? "Oh man I was pretty f-cked up, but yeah I guess that was a blunt. Whatever. Glad I didn't get caught doing what I did next!" - Justin Bieber. How much easier everyone's life would be! Think about being this honest, other celebrities. Follow the example of Mr. Rich Dollaz. Let Rich Dollaz lead the way into a new time of unabashedness, confidence, pride. Hollaz for Dollaz. [Page Six]

Another youngster caught doing illicit things is Johnny Manziel, the Heisman Trophy-winning Texas A&M quarterback. He went out in Dallas on Saturday night to celebrate his team's recent Cotton Bowl victory and he was snapped enjoying a bottle of Dom Perignon. Trouble is, he's 20 years old. Which is under the legal drinking age! Shame, shame, shame. Grand shame to him and his family. What a terrible thing. He is not old enough to drink. If he wants to go over to Afghanistan and get blown up on a mountain, he can go right ahead and do that. But he cannot celebrate a football game with some champagne. Because he is not mature enough for that. How dare he. And really I mean how dare he waste a bottle of Dom Perignon on his undeveloped 20-year-old palate. Cooks or Andre would probably do the trick here, Johnny. Send the expensive bottle to your parents. Though, of course, you can't actually do that, because you are 20. What a country. [TMZ]