Today in celebrity gossip: An old couple got hot and heavy at a New York club, tempers flare at American Idol, and Amanda Bynes really does not like Lindsay Lohan. 

After all that, are Chris Brown and Rihanna back together? No, not officially or anything, but fellow clubgoers are saying that on Monday night the pair was seen intimately dancing and then popping off to the bathroom together for a few minutes to, I don't know, probably hug and talk about politics. A witness told Page Six: "They sat two tables away from each other. Chris made his way over to Rihanna. He raised his shirt and was dancing promiscuously. Then they started dancing together and hugging and kissing in front of everyone." Wait, what? He "raised his shirt and was dancing promiscuously"? Is that how it's done now? Is that how young men are presenting to ladies? Boy the times have changed. Used to be a fella would just grunt and fiddle with his wallet chain. I blame Taylor Lautner. Not sure why, but this is probably his fault. Anyway, after Chris Brown did his alluring abs dance of seduction, the pair slinked off to the loo together and were in there for five or so minutes. When they left, the witness says, "She seemed a little ruffled." Well, right, I mean you would look ruffled too if you'd just been in a bathroom hugging and talking about the situation in Benghazi and what it might mean for the foreign policy debate in a couple weeks. Look, who knows what they were doing in that bathroom! Might they have been sharing their private parts with one another? It's possible, of course it's possible. Might they have been enjoying some of the devil's pixie powder? That's been known to happen in nightclub bathrooms. But really they may as well have been playing Bananagrams in there for all we know. Because we will never know for sure. That bathroom at Griffin represents all there is in the unknowable world of private lives. People are always retreating into that nightclub bathroom. To do whatever it is that people do that will remain a secret to the rest of us forever. That's Narnia right there, that nightclub bathroom. It's Fillory. Maybe Chris and Rhi-Rhi felt like they were gone for a hundred years, but for everyone on the outside, swaying to the sweet beats at Griffin, it was just five ruffling minutes. Who knows! It's all a mystery. Mysteries and ache, that's all this world is. So, club on, everybody. [Page Six]

Uh oh. There seems to be some trouble on the set of the new and maybe not at all improved American Idol. TMZ has found a video of new judge Nicki Minaj being perhaps a bit overzealous in expressing her discomfort with a situation at work. Basically the video is her yelling, mostly about fellow new judge Mariah Carey, while Randy tries to calm her down and Mariah responds inaudibly. Nicki is really mad about something, possibly there was some disagreement over a contestant's performance. (Minaj is, of course, a lifelong Kevin Covais supporter and will not brook any criticism of her beloved Chicken Little.) It then escalated into Minaj doing a bit of ranting about Carey saying, "I told them I'm not f*ckin' putting up with her f**kin' highness over there." Uh ohhhh. Trouble on the set! What a disaster, right? Haha, no, wrong, of course wrong. This is amazing for Fox. Fox is thrilled. Fox probably leaked this video. What better way to reinvigorate a fading series than with some good old fashion grand diva cat fights? People will tune in allll season long if Minaj and Carey continue on this way. All they need to do now is craft some really witty, charming, will they/won't they romance for Randy Jackson and Keith Urban and they are in business. Untouchable. So, rage on, Nicki. And next time respond a little louder, Mariah. And Randy and Keith why don't you... Yes... Yes... That's right... Kiss.... [TMZ]

Sarah Jessica Parker says that she is done with characters that are similar to the beloved Carrie Bradshaw. She recently said in a magazine interview, "I don't love the idea of playing another woman who loves fashion and is slightly flawed in New York City. I loved Sex and the City's Carrie and I don't want to do the poor man's version of her. And while those are often the lucrative things to do, it's more reason to look in the other direction." Which, sure, of course, absolutely. Totally understandable. Variety is the spice of life. And you wouldn't want to sully a great character by doing some cheap knock-off version of it, which is why she would never do Sex and the City 2. Which... Ah, right. Well, whatever, the point is, now she's done, it's over. No more. We're gonna see whole new things from SJP. We can't wait! And don't forget to tune into Glee this Thursday, on which Parker is guesting as a Vogue.com fashion editor living in New York City. [People]

Amanda Bynes apparently hates Lindsay Lohan and "rambles about 'that bitch Lindsay' all the time." Perhaps because Lohan has done some tweeting about Bynes, wondering why she doesn't get arrested for kinda the same stuff that Lindsay was basically sent to Azkaban for. So the two don't like each other, is the point, and both are currently embroiled in their own pretty messy sagas. And look: The Bynes thing is a little scary. It does seem that there is maybe some kind of mental cataclysm going on, some sort of post-adolescent onset sort of a thing, and if that's the case that is scary and sad and we should not make fun of it. That said, guys do you realize how close we are to this becoming some kind something where they move into a crumbling mansion together and bicker and snipe at one another for decades and decades, wearing old furs, hair up in turbans, shuffling around in the leaf-strewn rooms, constantly searching for a cat that maybe never existed? We are closer to that becoming a reality than ever before, and while we would all of course prefer that they both get better and go on to lead healthy and productive lives, if they are going to continue in a bad way, I just ask that they do it together in a creepy old mansion. That's all. Think of it as the buddy system. They'll be safer together, screeching at one another until one needs help opening a can or shooing a crow out of the living room. It could be wonderful. [Us Weekly]

Hey ladiessss. (And gents, definitely some gents.) This weekend marks the opening of Channing Tatum's exciting "Magic Mike-themed" restaurant/bar in New Orleans! This rollicking place on Bourbon Street isn't exactly a strip-club, but according to Tatum's wife it is "burlesque themed." Tatum is having a big opening party there this weekend, to which he's invited some Magic Mike costars, like Matt Bomer and Joe Manganangamellio or whatever. Should be a wonderful time. The only problem? The joint's name. It's called Saints and Sinners, which is a very annoying name. Yes, we get it, New Orleans, saints, sin, etc. Very clever. It's not a good name. It's not as bad as Pete Wentz's (now defunct) East Village bar Angels & Kings, which was trying to be dignified and interesting and almost poetic in this really annoying effortful way the way Pete Wentz is annoying and effortful entirely, but it is still pretty bad. Is it too late to rethink the name? Why not just call it Channing's? People would definitely go. [Page Six]

Here are some pictures of Taylor Swift and Emma Stone, who I guess are best friends, leaving a cafe in Paris together. They'd had lunch, both in town for Fashion Week (and for Swift to shoot a music video), and then they left. Huh. Wouldn't it be nice to be in your early 20s with your best friend and getting lunch in Paris? Just like that, on a Tuesday. "Oh, you know, popping over to Paris. Taylor and I will have lunch and then we'll go back to our fancy hotels and that will be that." Must be nice! Is all I'm sayin'. Enjoy it, kids. As a little gift to make us feel better about the fact that we are not in Paris having lunch with our friends, the Daily Mail gives us a random picture of Andrew Garfield at the bottom of the post. Thanks for that, guys. That helps. [Daily Mail]