Even if you win tonight's $149 million Powerball jackpot, there's no way you'd be able to buy the best apartment in New York City's tallest residential building, One57, as The New York Times reports that the 90th floor, 11,000 square-foot, $95 million duplex has already been sold to one of the building's several billionaire buyers. The cash value of tonight's Powerball drawing is $94.2 million--around $1 million short of what the duplex was sold for. You'll have to settle for one of the other shacks which go for $45 million and $50 million.

But regardless of your price restrictions, The Times' Alexei Barrionuevo, serves up a mash-up of House Hunters and business reporting with his story on the not-yet-but-almost-completed One57 and its filthy rich buyers ("The scale of wealth in this building is just unheard of.") Barrionuevo's report hits that sweet spot between softcore real estate porn (we'd argue it really be certified real-estate porn if the building isn't completed and all we have are renderings?) and enviable hate-read (those two usually go hand-in-hand) and is littered with its share of wealthy people problems ("The construction elevator took six minutes to ascend 850 feet to an apartment on the 85th floor"). So basically, if you thought Jay-Z's 18-foot tower of $800-per-bottle champagne seemed like the week's most superfluous way of flashing money, Barrionuevo sees your bet and raises you, well, one of the few places in Manhattan where you have views of the Bronx, Central Park, and the Hudson River and, more importantly but more importantly, a place where'd you'd be able to scoff and shout down gardening tips to your neighbor (in his $88-million penthouse). 

The building seems almost centered along the south end of Central Park. From the apartment’s main living room, the park seems to roll out like a giant green carpet. On a clear day, you can see all the way to the Bronx. To the east, planes can be seen taking off from La Guardia and Kennedy Airports. The Atlantic Ocean pokes out over the horizon. To the northwest, the gentle bend in the Hudson River is visible. Closer in, you can see the grassy terrace of the $88 million penthouse at 15 Central Park West.

Screenshot via New York Times video, found here.