The Call Sheet sifts through the day's glut of Hollywood news to find the stories even non-industry types care about. Today: Paula Abdul doesn't have that certain X-factor, Adam Sandler heads to board game-land, and SNL is a man down.

The first: After a previous two decades of rises and falls, the New Paula Abdul, cartoon cat dance partner and drag race officiator, leaves American Idol in 2009 after asking for too much money and not having her contract renewed. The second: Abdul's new reality show Live to Dance debuts to poor ratings, sputters through one lame season and is canceled. The third: Word broke last night and this morning that Abdul, along with host Steve Jones and fellow judge Nicole Scherzinger, would not be back The X Factor next season, after each received various criticisms throughout the show's semi-popular, but mostly lackluster first season. Hm, you could actually probably squeeze another couple rises and falls in there related to that Hey Paula reality show, but we don't have all day, do we? But yes, in a desperate scramble to rework the show so more people will watch it next season, Simon Cowell has chosen to fire his host and fellow judges, though all he probably had to do was have One Direction over from the UK and do a single shirtless concert on the show and he'd have all of teen girl America forever. But Simon doesn't like doing that, he likes firing people, so fired people he has. Chief among them his dear friend Paula Abdul. So that's one more sad story for Paula, one more in a sea of many. [Deadline, The Hollywood Reporter]

Oh good. Hasbro has signed a deal with Columbia and Happy Madison to put together a Candy Land movie, with Adam Sandler to star. So that's just great. The weird meta experiment of making Adam Sandler's character in Funny People come to life is well under way. Candy Land. With Adam Sandler. That just doesn't even sound real, does it? It sounds like a joke from Funny People: 2 Funny, 2 People. Is that what's happening here? Are we being Apatow'd? Please tell us we're being Apatow'd. [Deadline]

Sad news: Saturday Night Live's resident weird little wiggly worm Paul Brittain is leaving the show, to become a judge on The X Factor write and direct Candy Land "pursue other projects." So, usually that whole "pursue other projects" routine is just bullshit to save face, but it is pilot season right now, so maybe he figured that SNL hasn't been using him that much so why not do some other plum project? Let's hope so, because he's very funny. Way funnier than Jay Pharoah or Vannessa Bayer or Abby Elliott, anyway. Not to, like, name the women and the minorities there, it's just how the funny cookie happened to crumble this season on SNL. So, oh well. See ya, Wyndemere! Dance away now. [Entertainment Weekly]

HBO has renewed their new series Luck after just one episode, citing strong reviews. Strong reviews, we're guessing, by critics too embarrassed to admit that they had no idea what anyone was saying because mumble-mumble, jargon-jargon, whooo boy does that show hardly make sense. We're not afraid to admit it! We don't understand a single thing going on on that show. But, maybe some do. Or are pretending to. Oh well, the point is the show is renewed, even though, as has been pointed out, its premiere got beat in the ratings on Sunday night by a non-premiere of Shameless, which is on Showtime, which has far fewer subscribers. So, oh well. HBO knows what it's doing, we guess. Race on, confusing show! [The New York Times]

If there's one thing you can say about Broadway, it's that it's so Raven. At least it's about to be! Former Cosby Show actress Raven-Symoné will be taking over the lead role, a biiig singing role, in the Sister Act musical currently limping along on the White Way. That's quite a part! Can Raven-Symoné sing that hard? Who knows. Only one way to find out, we suppose. Now if they'd just announce that Phylicia Rashad was going to take over the Mother Superior role, then we'd be guaranteed ticket buyers. Do it! Cosby reunion! Cast Elvin as something! Sabrina Le Beauf! Everybody! [Deadline]

In pilot news: ABC has greenlit a single-camera comedy starring the long-suffering (well, long-suffering at least in terms of steadily working and critically acclaimed Hollywood actresses) Judy Greer. It's a show based on her life, which had her leaving LA to move to a small suburb with her new husband and his kids. So, it's wacky family/fish-out-of-water comedy. That doesn't sound all that promising thematically, but we've got our fingers crossed for you, Judy. You deserve it! Also in pilot newz, The CW has ordered some new pilots, among them a "Hunger Games-style" (Hungahhhh!!) drama called The Selection, described as "an epic romance set 300 years in the future which centers on a poor young woman who is chosen by lottery to participate in a competition to become the next queen of a war-torn nation at a crossroads." Also they greenlit Shelter, a show co-produced by J.J. Abrams about a New England summer resort and all the zany guests and sexy young employees and stuff. So it basically should be called Every Suburban Boston Teenager's Summertime Fantasy. Though it's J.J. Abrams, it doesn't sound like it's going to be weird and sci-fi-y at all. It's Felicity J.J. Abrams, not Alcatraz J.J. Abrams. We must admit: We are intrigued by both of these shows! Film away, CW. [The Hollywood Reporter, Entertainment Weekly]

Here is a trailer for the upcoming Euro thriller Cold Light of Day, a Spain-set thriller starring future Superman (and current sexbomb) Henry Cavill as Bruce Willis's son, who is trying to get his family back from terrorists or something, plus Sigourney Weaver shows up and is vaguely menacing, as seems to be all she does these days. This is directed by the guy who did the bizarre (but interesting) JCVD and has a good cast (Caroline Goodall!), so we will probably see it. It's like Taken except in Spain and the dad is Bruce Willis. Plus: Henry Cavill. Do people say "hubba hubba" anymore? They should.