The Call Sheet sifts through the day's glut of Hollywood news to find the stories even non-industry types care about. Today: Americans like women in their underwear, two new trailers fail to impress, and Christopher Meloni on 'True Blood'? 

This may come as a surprise to you, but many people in America want to watch beautiful women walk around in their underpants. Yup. Shocking, we know. This curious fact was proven by the ratings success of last night's CBS special airing of a Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, a parade of jiggles and juts that attracted some 10.3 million viewers, for a big, busting 4.6 rating. That's a lotta people! What was the demographic, we wonder? Probably women curious about the garments! That's very likely, that it was just a lot of groups of gals getting together to see what's new in the world of underpants, each gal making a list of what underpant products she wants to buy, that kind of thing. That's definitely what the audience for this thing was. Well, them and maybe one fourteen-year-old boy who just had the best night of his life. [EW]

Uh oh, watch out. Someone's gonna get too close to the case... if that case is a coffin! Erstwhile Law & Order SVU frowner Chris Meloni might be doing a big guest arc on the next season of True Blood, playing a super dupes powerful vampire. A vampire who's devoutly Catholic and lives in Queens and worries about his daughters so much that he sees his daughters in every victim, right? Because we're pretty sure that's all that Chris Meloni does these days. And it could work. "Vampire Stabler, you're getting too close to the stake." "You're getting too close to the werewolf." "You're getting too close to the secret monster fairy godmother." Etc. We endorse this. [TV Line]

Christian Bale was Darren Aronofsky's first choice to play Noah in his big Noah's Ark movie, but Bale has decided instead to do two Terence Malick movies. This leaves room, some suspect, for the suddenly everywhere Michael Fassbender to step in. Beyoncé's baby bump is still confirmed to play the pivotal role of Mt. Ararat. [Variety]

Watch out! Musical theater cat fight! Which, as we should all know by now, is absolutely the worst kind of fight there can ever be. It seems that Lea Michele, Evan Rachel Wood, Scarlett Johansson, and Taylor Swift (yuppp) are all in the running to play Eponine in the big Les Miserables musical movie that's getting made. Eponine is the one who sings "On My Own." So, while these choices are interesting (well, not that interesting; they're all annoying in their own special, individual way) it's pretty clear that there's really only one person who could possibly play this role. [P6]

Zach Levi, of spy show The Chuck, a show about Chuck, has been tapped to host the Video Game Awards on Spike TV. So... that'll be dynamic? Can't wait to see Chuck from The Chuck crackin' jokes about vidja games. Hoo-eee, that's going to be a corker, that evening of television! Almost as thrilling as an all new episode of The Chuck, this Friday at 8/7c. [Spike]

Here is a promo video thing for the new Iraq vet drama The Lucky One (not to be confused with the Iraq vet drama The Lucky Ones), a movie based on a Nicholas Sparks book and starring Zac Efron as a guy who finds a picture of a cute girl on the floor in Iraq and carries it around with him and, uh... looks at it. Y'know, like some people looked at the Victoria's Secret thing. Anyhoo, he comes back from the war and finds the girl and of course he falls in love with her farm and the old Blythe Danner she keeps out on the porch, while she falls in love with his arms and his black underpants and that's the movie. And this trailer, with all its earnest American lovemaking, goes to prove that, in some strange way, Nicholas Sparks is the most perverted man in America. Just a real dirty bird, that one. 

 
The actress Alice Eve, who played the Pretty Girl in She's Out of My League and the love of Vinnie Chase's life on the finale of HBO's searing docudrama Entourage, is in negotiations to play a "significant" role in J.J. Abrams' next Star Trek movie. That must be exciting for her. Will she be playing Kirk's mom? Like, remember when Winona Ryder played Spock's mom and that was really weird? They should just have Alice Eve play Kirk's mom. Or Scotty's mom. She is British, after all. Then we'll get Keke Palmer to be Uhura's mom and Lily from Modern Family to play Sulu's mom and we'll be in good shape. Cast away, J.J.! [THR]
 
Here is a list of films that will be in dramatic competition at this year's Sundance Sponsorship Festival. It sounds like a good lineup, with movies featuring Tim & Eric, Lizzy Caplan, and Aubrey Plaza. It's your usual mix of dark quirk and light quirk, with some sad things about children peppered in here and there. Obviously it will be more exciting when we find out who's sponsoring what party, because that's what really matters at Sundance, but this is cool info to have for now. [Vulture]
 
Yikes. This is a trailer, sort of, for John Carter, the big space opera directed by Pixar's Andrew Stanton and starring the intergalactic space hunk Taylor Kitsch. And it does not look-a so good. Right? That first trailer was cool with that intense song and all, but this is just cartoonish CGI and trite things about "This isn't my war" or whatever. Kitsch and the movie's love interest Lynn Collins were also in X-Men Origins: Wolverine together and that movie was worse than Ishtar, so maybe they should just stop making movies together? We hate to be harsh on something that Mr. Kitsch, ancient smolder deity, has done, but eesh. Not promising.