Here at The Atlantic Wire, we respect and value the social media editors who share the links that make our jobs easier. Sometimes, though, we have no idea what they're talking about. So after a day of staring at Twitter, we're sharing our favorites.

Thieves stealing X-ray film to harvest silver... Oct 18 13:36:58 via Drudge

Buy gold, steal silver.

City Room: Detroit Beats New York, in Baseball and in Terror Trials Oct 18 12:49:22 via The New York Times

That's a notable distinction. But you still don't want to build a tourism campaign around the slogan "Terror Trial Capital of the United States."

Herman Cain isn't the only GOP candidate with vocal cords Oct 18 16:10:26 via SocialFlow

Take Jon Huntsman. He has vocal cords. But they don't form words that make GOP primary voters forget the fact he worked for President Obama.

A dad disciplined his 16-year-old daughter by forcing her to duel for two hours in a suit of armor. Oct 18 20:20:20 via The Huffington Post

This used to be a common practice raising kids. You had to have the evening paper and a gin-and-tonic ready at exactly 6 p.m., or spend two weeks after school in the dueling suit.

Local news: Zombies and witches at war in Salem - Oct 18 14:14:20 via Tweets

Wars between unholy forces of darkness don't have the same luster they used to. And why should they? Everyone knows the Salem district attorney is just going to give them 30 hours of community service. Who wouldn't rise from the grave if they knew they weren't going to do time for it?

#FriendOrFoe: "I skipped my best friend's wedding and now I want her back." Oct 18 19:06:28 via SocialFlow

Should have thought of that before you skipped the wedding. Also should have thought of it before you decided not to quietly poison the relationship when they started dating.

Fixed: Mitt Romney is waging cyber war on Rick Perry Oct 18 14:44:22 via TweetDeck

Remember the last Die Hard? It's just like that. Except Rick Perry's Bruce Willis and Mitt Romney's Timothy Olyphant.